Witch Hunt

In America, any child can grow up to become President. Or so we are told. It really helps if you do not have a Protection From Abuse Order pending against you though.

Presumably, any child can grow up to be Lieutenant Governor of Pennsylvania as well. It may be that a PFA will not keep you from Harrisburg. Teddy (Yes, he goes by “Teddy”. It worked for Roosevelt) Daniels is among seven Republicans running for the Lt Gov nomination this month. Teddy has a decent chance. He is endorsed by Doug Mastriano who is leading the GOP pack seeking the gubernatorial nomination.

In fact, Teddy was alongside Doug at the Capitol on Jan 6. They supposedly did not vandalize the building though.

Teddy developed a unique campaign fundraising ploy. He auctioned off a customized assault weapon. Would you rather receive a MAGA hat for your donation or an AR-15 with a scope and silencer?

Teddy spiced up a Lt Gov debate by threatening to “meet an opponent outside” (presumably after recess on the playground just like in grade school). Since Teddy is 6’-4” and 340 lbs, the opponent declined.

Political campaigns can put a strain on a marriage. Teddy shouted at his wife in her workplace until he was removed. He grabbed her by her blouse and shook her and threatened to kill the family dog. A judge issued the PFA which required Teddy to vacate the family home and to give up his firearms. You can take away a Republican’s bed but never his weapons!

Teddy claimed that this was a “witch hunt” (sound familiar?). His wife’s co-workers who witnessed Teddy’s fury disagreed.

There are 12 million people living in Pennsylvania. Can’t we find someone a bit more stable than Teddy Daniels to be our Lt Gov?

By Ed Dufton