Vision Pro

The hits just keep on coming for Apple — the Mac, the iPad, the iPhone, the Apple Watch. All are absolutely “top of the line”. All are “must haves” for the Cool Kids.

Apple will place the Vision Pro headset on sale to the public tomorrow. For a mere $3,499, you can be the “first on your block” to wander aimlessly, waving your arms, flicking your fingers, and reacting to things that only you can see. That would have brought the men in white coats to strap you into a straitjacket back in the day. Now it makes you a Cool Kid.

By the way, my beloved first car, a ’69 Dodge Dart cost only $2,800, brand new. Of course, it didn’t have the digital sophistication of the Apple Vision Pro.

Will crowds of geeks begin lining up outside Apple stores and burst through the doors at midnight? The reviews are posted, and they are not entirely positive.

“Watching movies or streaming shows is kind of a joy, aside from having to wear a headset the whole time. The Vision Pro might have the sharpest screens I’ve ever seen in a headset, but you’ll still see some black space in your peripheral vision.” I was hoping to be fully immersed in “Beavis and Butthead” without that annoying black space in my peripheral vision.

The Vision Pro can also be used for work. “If the Vision Pro and a Mac computer — sorry, Windows fans — are signed into the same Apple ID, just looking at the Mac prompts a “connect” button to appear; tapping it shuts off the Mac’s screen and migrates whatever was on the screen to the headset. From there, you can resize and move the VR version of your monitor as you please, and try to type by either looking at letters on a virtual keyboard and pinching your fingers to select them, or by trying to type directly on that keyboard.” So you just look at your monitor screen and it moves onto your Vision Pro? You just look at a keyboard and pinch your fingers and it types? Finally, “two finger typist Ed” can keep up with those nerds who use both hands.

While you are immersed in Vision Pro World, people from the real world may want to contact you verbally. “You’re not wearing pants! Don’t go outside like that!”

“When you’re wearing Vision Pro and you turn to look at an actual person — or if one wanders into your field of view — you’ll see them emerge through your app windows. Talking to those folks feels pretty normal, since you can see them as you always would. But of course, you’ll look a little odd with a computer strapped to your face, even when its outer screen is displaying a facsimile of your eyes.”

So, the real world does not see my actual eyes, but the Vision Pro’s “facsimile” of them. How freaky will it be when people wander about the streets of America essentially wearing masks with “eyes” painted on them.

Sorry, Tim Cook. I will not be lined up outside your Apple Store at midnight for my Vision Pro. In fact, I will actively avoid it. The Vision Pro freaks me out.

By Ed Dufton